WELCOME TO

Hi friends,

Well not sure where to start, so i'll just ramble on and see where we get too lol,

Gosh a lot has happened since i was last here, (not all of it good),

Update on the back problem first, Still unable to work it has been seven month now, i have not worked since 5th sept 08!

Most of you already know i fractured my sacrum in two places at the age of 13, so i have had a chronic back problem ever since then,

but to cut a long story short although this meant i had a backache that came and went it didn't really stop me from doing most things a person without a back problem would do, at the age of 20 straight after giving birth to my first born son i started having bigger problems with my back, i saw a specialist at that time i still lived in Hull,

so this was at Hull royal infirmary, i had x-rays done and they still had the x-rays from when i originially broke my back, i was told by the specialist that the two fractures hadn't healed properly mainly because i was never put in traction or put into a back brace (hence their fault) but now as it was 7/8 years later there wasn't a lot they could do! As surgery would mean having to rebreak the bone and this was too risky as it could leave me paralized from the waist down or incontinent of both bladder and bowels, not what you want to hear when your a new mum and only 20 yr old, so i asked what would happen in the future and was told that i would have  this chronic back problem for rest of my life, (gee great) i thought! I was told that the back problem would get worse as i got older, and that i would probably get arthritis in the spine sooner rather than later, they said i would probably not be able to have another baby as my back wouldn't be able to take the strain of carrying a baby for nine month and that i wouldn't be able to deliver a baby on my own as my muscles wouldn't take child birth again, they were wrong i had two more beautifull children and i delivered them both naturally, it was only my first baby that i had to have the forceps. But they  where right about my back pain  getting worse as i got older, it started to get really bad in july last year whilst on holiday in turkey i thought it was probably just the not so comfy bed, or lounging on sun beds that had caused a flare up, but after getting home and going back to work it wasn't getting any easier and i had a fortnight off work to rest, didn't get any better, but went back to work anyway, (not a good idea) Working in house keeping with a bad back, one day at work begining of september i just collapsed with the pain couldn't stand it no longer, this was my last day at work! I couldn't move for 2 week's was just in agony, gp put me on morphine and loads of other drugs so all i really remember is being spaced out for most of it. This was where my journey started back and fourth to the gp surgery untill eventually gp decided it was time i saw a specialist again, So i was sent to see the reumotologist at kings mill hospital had more x-rays which didn't really show anything new, so they decided physio might do me good! didn't do a damn thing mainly because i was in so much pain the therapist couldn't do much with me. So eventually in Febuary this year they did an MRI scan which showed that i have degenaration of my lower 4th and 5th discs of the spine in other words they have crumbled away nothing much left  of them so vertebre is on top of vertebre with no disc inbetween,

specialist decided i was to be referred to the back pain clinic, and that the first thing they would try is an injection into the spine to help with the pain, this has to be done in theatre, again because of the risk thing that if i move whilst having it it could do more harm than good, so i have my first appointment booked to see the specialist in the back clinic for the 7th of april and i cant wait, i will probably have to wait a while after seeing him before i get the first jab (theatre slot and all that)

But i have fingers crossed this will work better than all of the drugs they have had me on in the last 7 month.

 

Work wise as well as seeing my own gp and the specialist at the hospital, i also have to see the company doctor at work, (downside of working for big company centre parcs) when i saw him in December last year he said he didn't think it would possible for me to be able to return to my possition in housekeeping and he was going to put a recomendation in for a transfer into admin dept so that i would be able to return back to work, probably part time, but anything better than nothing right! well i heard nothing from work so i just kept sending them the sick notes, i saw him again 24th of Febuary (4 days after i got my MRI results) I asked him what was happening about finding me a job else where on parc? He said now he had the scan results it looked unlikely they would offer me another job and that i would probably have to take reduncancy due to ill health! But that they would need to obtain a full medical report from my gp first, so i filled in the forms giving them permission to see the report i spoke to a very nice lady from the admin dept at my surgery and she told me that this usually takes 2 months from filling in the consent form to work getting the report, so i am in limbo at mo waiting to hear wether i will have a job still at centre parcs or if they are making me redundant! ( uurrgh! More waiting story of my life eh)

 

Most of you know that i have had loads of ups and ups down in my relationship with Carl, and some of you will remember the blogs nearly a year ago about him not wanting the same commitment i wanted, For those of you that do know you know i wanted us to live together and maybe one day even marraige, Another long story im trying to cut short lol, anyways although i wasn't getting the commitment i would of liked i stayed with him for another year making that 4 year we were seeing each other for.

I hoped given more time (more waiting lol) Carl would change his mind and that we would eventually get together as a proper couple after all 4 years is a long time and i didn't want to lose him and being his girlfriend was betting than being on my own right! i convinced myself that one day we would get a place together and that all the waiting would be worth it one day.

Well not to be we broke up just over a month ago, I havn't blogged about it before because although we arn't together as boyfriend / girlfriend anymore we are still friends, and i keep hoping he will come to his senses and realise what he has chucked away! We were so good together once and i still love him madly if he turned up tonight asking me to marry him the answer of course would be YES! But some how i don't think that is going to happen so i am single again, but im sure Mr right is out there somewhere so who knows what the future may bring.

 

well i am sure by now i must of bored you all to death, i don't come on here often now, this being my reason why i have nothing good to tell you all! just my boreing schedule with doctors and hospital appointments lol. i hang out a lot on facebook as i find i can be more myself on there so if any of you are on there please feel free to send an invite i promise i am more fun on there ask Bob, Robin and Lorraine lol! I would like to thank those of you that leave me comments etc in my guestbook even though im not around much, thank you much appreciated.

Love n hugs to all fran xxxx

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Morning Peeps,

Just to let my good friends know i may be away from my pc for a few days,

I have got the bug that my son and his girlfriend had

I thought i had done well to avoid getting it this long lol,

best place for me at mo is my bed!

So hope you are all well and i will be back when feeling better.

Love n hugs Fran xxxx

evening peeps,

well i have been playing nurse most of the day to my son Lewis and his girlfriend jenni,

Lewis started feeling unwell on monday with a bad headache and a sore throat,

by tuesday his glands were up and so was his temperature, yesterday his temperature was so high, he was so hot to touch but he was shivering,

i made him go have a cool bath to try bring his temp down, this did help but he looked so poorly i wanted to call the doctor out, but he insisted i didn't

His girlfriend has been staying over at our house because they are both off college this week, last night she took ill too,

i got up this morning and was shocked when i saw jenni, her lips were all swollen up, and so was both her ears, she looked like she had been in a fight,

she said this had happened last year when she got tonsilitis, so of course i thought this might not be flu, have they both got tonsilitis,

neither of them wanted to go to the docs, (kids are so stubborn at their age) so i have been giving them both parecetomol, and they have been sucking on the strepsils, i've been making cold ice drinks for them, and putting cold facecloths on their foreheads.

Lewis has finally managed to eat a bowl of cereal tonight so i am hoping that what ever it is he got, it is on its way out.

poor jenni was sick earlier, but she felt a bit better after, hoping they both feel much better in the morning,

and as for me well i still got the blooming headache 3rd day now .

think im away to my bed now, so nite nite all.

Fran xxx

 

Well my long awaited day came today,

I have finally got some answers as to why my back pain has been so bad for the last 8 month's,

the M.R.I  Results showed that i have dengeration of the 4th and 5th lower discs of my spine,

(which basically means they are wearing away) with arthritis,

i was told that it's not normal to have arthritis to this extent at my age, (since when have i ever been normal) lol,

My arthritis is more like what you would expect to find in an older person in their seventys, not in their 30's,

All i was really told is that you cant replace the disc's, but i can have treatment to help with the pain,

I also learn't today that my spine is not just curved inwards anymore ( i have had lordosis) which is an inward curve to the lower spine since i broke the sacrum,

but now it is S shaped this is called scoliosis, and i don't know much about that yet or what it means or what treatment if any there is for that.

But the good news is i have now been handed over to the back pain management clinic, which means i will get treatment, and the specialist i saw today said the

first thing they would probably try is injections into my spine, (don't like sound of that) but if it helps with the pain thats good enough for me!

so i just have to wait now for my first appointment, and to see what they are going to try first.

Well it has been a long day today and i'm still trying to get my head around what i was told,

so im off to my bed now peeps, and hoping things will seem a bit clearer in the morning.

Ni nite all.

fran xxx

 

 

 

 

 If you love me

 

Wish i could tell by the look in your eyes (where i stand)

Wish i could tell what your feeling inside (but i can't)

Wish you would say what i'm needing to hear (you want me)

Give me a sign that would make it all clear (just show me)

don't leave my heart out here on the line.

 

If you love me let me know

So all of me can just let go

You can have me heart and soul

if you love me ...... Then just let me know

 

You let me think that i don't have a chance (none at all)

You turn away when i capture your glance (should i fall)

and then you say you've been dreaming of me (all night)

And i don't know what i should believe

 

I want to give you what you need

i want to be there in your dreams

You gotta show me that you want it as much as i do

 

wish i could tell by the look in your eyes

don't leave my heart out here on the line

 

If you love me let me know

So all of me can just let go

you can have me heart and soul

If you love me ...... then just let me know.

 

                                             fran xxxxx

                                           The most valuable treasure

                                           that there is in life to hold

                                           is a friendship that endures

                                                no matter how the

                                                     years unfold.

 

 

                                     When you find the kind of friendship

                                      where you can truly be yourself

                                      It is a friendship to be treasured

                                           over and above all else.

 

 

                                        A friend is a special person who

                                          no matter what life brings

                                       helps us to see the bright side of

                                           so many different things

                                        a true friend is always loyal

                                         and shows a sense of care

                                   and with whom our hopes and dreams

                                              we may always share.

 

 

                                       When we have a friendship

                                           so special and so true

                                       then we know we have a gift

                                               that will last a

                                             lifetime through.

 

 

                                          many people will walk

                                          in and out of your life

                                          but only true friends

                                          will leave footprints

                                              in your heart.

 

 

                                        Having a special friend

                                          with whom we share

                                                    a bond

                                        brings joy to every day

                                        as life's path we walk along.

 

 

                                         Friendship is a blessing-

                                          a gift from life itself

                                       to be treasured in the heart

                                         over and above all else.

 

 

                                      Of the friends we meet

                                          through the years

                                      some stay and others go

                                         and those who stay

                                            bring friendships

                                         from which priceless

                                             treasures flow.

 

 

                                                Fran xxxxx

 

Yesterday i went over to my friends house to help her pack up the rest of her stuff, as she is leaving us all behind and buggering off to austrailia for good!

Lucky thing eh!

Everything that she wasn't taking had to be bagged up for either the charity shops, Or the big items for the housing project scheme,

as we were sorting threw everything she kept saying anything you want or can make use of please feel free to take,

So i now have a brand new bedding set, with matching pillows, and scatter cushions and a throw all for my bed.

Three ornaments (all very nice) and all match my newly decorated kitchen very nice.

And about 20 pairs of new still in the box's stockings!

Why she bought so many i dont know, as she said she cant remember the last time she wore a pair of stockings lol!

So im not sure when or for who (lol), I'm going to wear these, But at least i won't be buying any for a while!

Wishing you all a great weekend

Bye for now Fran xxxxx

 

 After my shower!

 Hair done and lippy on, Ready to go!